You know you've been paddling for too long when...
- Your closet contains a 5:1 ratio of polypro and fleece to normal clothes
- To you, foreplay, XXX, and dominatrix are associated with boats, and porn is a kayak video.
- Stripping in the open is normal and not something that you expect to get paid for.
- You know exactly how many cans of beer can fit into any given boat design.
- You stop to examine possible lines on any trickle of water and then determine exactly how small you would have to be in order to be able to run it
successfully.
- You have caused multiple car accidents due to checking out rapids and water levels while driving.
- Your car is parked on the street due to your garage being too filled with boats and drying racks of kayak gear.
- You know every power station and dam release times by heart and your job has nothing to do with either.
- You sincerely believe that boats, gear, and kayakers don’t apply to a vehicles maximum weight restrictions and also believe that at heart all cars are four-wheel drive and thus are capable of driving in conditions that require
four-wheel drive.
- Among friends, you have debated the possibility and logistics involved in having sex in a kayak on multiple occasions.
- Your flatmates have placed a limit on the number of random stinky strangers that can sleep on your couch/floor at any given time.
- Your kayak is worth twice as much as your car, and your kayak gear is your most valuable asset.
- A hot plate filled with the combination of tuna fish, cheese, chips, noodles,
broccoli, tomatoes, rice, and eggs is one of the best meals you have ever
eaten.
- You can no longer smell polypro, and damn it, stripes are sexy!!!
- The most stamped cafe loyalty card is Zippy's Rotorua
- You own 2 kayaks (and for a while 3) but have no car - AKA J.Gunn
- A huge low about to hit the North Island, with the promise of tremendous rainfall, is a good thing because you might be able to do a new run.
- You make your schedule free for all of March and the Easter break, cos you don't want to miss anything. I haven't missed a single one of those trips in 4 seasons!
- Your CD collection consists of mainly road trip orientated music.
- Your Car has no wing mirrors!
- Your local takeaways are in Matamata.
- Giving directions you
refer to paddling spots instead of common place names.
You know you've been around AUCC for too long when...
- You automatically adjust from normal time to AUCC time by adding 2-3 hours to all trip departure times.
- You are considered to have reached a proficient level in the web of cest of
AUCC
- You have learned to never let Ian borrow your towel.
- You understand and accept the pain that will be associated with the morning
after any AUCC club event.
- You view vomiting and peeing on, in, or near someone’s car, tent, or person as just part of the dating process.
- You seem to have a growing list of foriegn friends who you can stay with all over the world.
- Your favourite meal is Vegetarian Nachos.
- You find long unnecessary emails about who ate someones pie a year ago funny. This isn't sarcasm, it really is funny!
- You can understand what Guido is actually saying.
- Potential Haikus about Yakka plague your mind.
- You hold onto useless clothing items in the event that they will be needed for a theme party
